Reasons Not To Live With Your Best Friends


Living with your best gal pals always seems like a freakin’ fantastic idea.
I remember signing my first lease and daydreaming about my girlfriends and I setting up our place, cooking great meals, drinking way too much wine and having pillow fights for our own damn good. Looking back on these daydreams, I seemed to have forgotten that we all had different schedules, different goals and pillow fights were not on the cards. 

In the end, even though the IDEA of living with great friends may seem like the right choice, think long and hard about the friendships that are worth keeping.


Your friends may come with emotional baggage


 The ability to be not only a friend, but a good friend, is important to sustain a meaningful friendship. If you or your roommates have some sort of problem that requires support from close friends, living with someone who needs that support can hinder relationships. Offering constant advice and being someone’s emotional crutch can be exhausting, especially when your first priority is taking care of yourself. Offering advice and support from a distance can be more helpful and encourage the person to problem solve on their own. This means that you can be a good friend and at the same time, be a useful source of advice without feeling overwhelmed.


Someone likes alcohol a little too much


We all party hard at Uni (well most) Sure that’s fun on the weekends or once and awhile, but there always seems to be a booze-hound in the house. Ok, these gatherings can be pretty fun, but how often do you really want to deal with the dirty aftermath of these events? The stench of booze-laden breath in class the next morning is only socially acceptable so many times. Make sure your gal pals have similar attitudes around drinking/partying or make sure you have strong enough willpower to do what you need to. This mindset comes with the complimentary title of house party-pooper.



They don’t have the same vengeful attitude as you do when it comes to a dirty kitchen (or any house common area)


So many of my past roommate conflicts have come from dirty common areas. Take, for example, the kitchen and dirty dishes. Who used what mug or who left their shit on the stove doesn’t really matter if, in the end, the dishes get cleaned. Just do your dishes when you’re finished using them (instead of leaving them to crust over and harbor bacteria in the sink). Doesn’t this seem like simple, common sense knowledge? I think so, too.

*Note: If you know, for a fact, that somebody is not cleaning their dishware (and you are looking to stir the pot hehe!) make a trail of dirty dishes from the sink to their bedroom. I cannot speak from experience but I hear this tactic is quite effective.

You have the same schedules


Hanging out with good friends is great, but hanging out with good friends in class, during your free time, during your meal times, and right before bed can be tolerable at most. Just like unlimited drunk pizza, your friends can be too much of a good thing. Take the personal time you need if your roommates become overwhelming…or just live with people who have different interests and never wanted to hang out with you in the first place.


Somebody has a pet


Any household with a pet can cause roommate conflict. If the owner is not taking full responsibility of their animal, I can guarantee somebody is not going to be happy. If you’re already having issues with your live-in friends, don’t drag a poor dog or cat into the mix. Animals can sense emotion from the people around them. Who wants a stressed out pooch/kitty/ferret/chinchilla/etc.? Not me.


They have significant others


This is a big one. You may not think that your roommates significant others should affect your feelings towards your roommate. Believe me, they will. Significant others tend to linger around the house and stay just a tiny bit over their welcome. This, of course, is brushed under the rug for a bit because it seems temporary. But, when this significant other starts using the cable/dishes/food/electricity/internet/washer/dryer and isn’t paying a penny, there’s a definite problem. It is obnoxious, it is impolite, and you will end up hating your roommate when she gets defensive after you bring up the obvious problems with her boyfriend hanging around 24/7. Plus, you have to deal with her significant other eating the majority of your snack food and leaving the toilet seat up (not cool).

 

You and your friends ‘split groceries’


Since you all get along so well anyways (I mean you’re such great friends), why not split groceries to make everything a bit easier? This never, ever works. Either someone’s going to get drunk and eat too many pizza slices or there will be some type of feud over who ate the last slice of bread. To outsiders, these examples seem minimal and harmless, but harboring ill will towards a roommate who you think took more than their fair share can be unhealthy and catty. Skip the drama and buy your own grub.


You are the responsible one who pays all the bills


Being in charge of monthly payments can be a bitch. Everyone is poor in Uni anyways and nobody wants the task of haggling money out of each roommate when a payment is looming. It’s harder to press people you like for money versus someone you could care less about. You never want bill paying to become anything more than a mere transaction. I would avoid being in charge of this task (it really sucks).
One final piece of advice: Do NOT use a dry-erase board for communication purposes. There is nothing more obnoxious than passive-aggressiveness. Just voice your opinion whenever there is an issue (especially if it effects more than just you). Don’t write it with an excessive amount of exclamation points or evil emoticons. This can make people feel slighted and crappy. 
 
Have you had better luck with friends?




Gratituesday: Summer Where Art Thou?

We are all down for a little cooler weather (being Brits and all!) but seriously where is Summer? Here's hoping it heats up come August! Lots of exciting projects in the pipeline, and so much to share soon! How about you? what is on your gratitude list this week?


 Aesthetically still an amazing film


Loving this. 
 Word 


 Cutesy Tattoos


 Yes.


Ever



Cute



Alice Always 

Little Things...

Looking forward to Christmas (ever too soon?) Funny texts Supportive people around you Motivation Positive Changes Nice emails Coffee, coffee, coffee Personal Trainers Tomatoes and Mozzarella Exciting projects Hotel Hunting Doggy Sweaters First Wives Club Early Morning Puppy Love Kisses The Prawn emoji (now, always forever) Crazy Family New Trainers Old show re runs

Rant Away


It’s something you tend to learn the hard way, but if I’ve learnt one thing recently it’s that drama, especially public drama, is not only a huge waste of time and energy, but can suck the life right out of you. It’s not good for anyone and just makes you look like a big moany old cow. Of course I’m not saying you should be a push over, but you shouldn’t let the dramas you encounter run your life either. Deal with situations in a calm and measured fashion, never lash out, never react on instinct.  Never air your dirty laundry in public. If someone upsets you, never email or phone them right away. Think about it, sleep on it, sort it out when you’ve calmed down. Because if you let it, drama can consume you and you can begin to perceive it as some warped kind of validation.

However in saying all this, I do personally believe that having a good old rant in private about something that’s upset you with a trusted confidant is good for the soul. It helps you work through the problem and gets it out of your system. How many times have you been so angry or upset about something one day, yet the next you can’t even remember what it was that got you so fired up? Keeping things bottled-up inside is a recipe for disaster and internalising everything is never the way forward. But here’s the key – have a moan and then let it go. Immediately.


Gratituesday: Healthy Living!

How is it nearly the end of July? who knows! We have to say although we love Summer, we are already getting excited for cosy nights and knitted sweaters, and the countdown to Christmas! (Probably all the Christmas in July press days we have been attending!) We have also been getting out healthy on (honestly a few days in, it makes you feel so much better!) Now what else is getting us into the grateful spirit? 


Ice cream chairs!



 We will be bringing back our crockery soon also!


 This tattoo though.




 So cute.

 This bedding.



Embroidery 



 Gorgeous soaps


Lavender



Glitter eyes 

Little Things...

Coffee dates with new friends exciting plans fresh starts fresh  foods changing hair puppy kisses stacking up bracelets high getting a personal trainer filofax obsessions summer time city strolls travel plans cherry smoothies deleting the toxic from your life changing hair styles networking big mugs of coffee lying in the grass day dreaming